What my Dad taught me in being a leader.

Last week, I boarded a plane to visit my family in the US. We are going through something I wish on no one and yet I know many of us have or will at some point in our lives. That is, the process of slowly losing a parent to a degenerative brain disease. My father has been in a decline in his health steadily for this entire year.  He has Parkinson's with dementia. I visited this past summer and since then his dementia has really progressed. There would be flashes of smiles and storytelling but mostly he was sleeping or zoned out. Now, being here I see with my own eyes how my father's disease has taken over him. As I mourn the loss of who he used to be, I realize there is a lot to cherish of who he was for me as a child and an adult. Those things I hold onto now more than ever. It is who he will always be. And that doesn't change for me. 

When I arrived in the US, it was the day of the US election results. As an American who lives abroad and a mother of a teenage daughter, this wasn't a happy moment for me, to say the least. I realize politics can really polarize us. I seldom use my business as a platform for political issues because I do not want my clients to feel that I have an issue with any of their choices. And I don't. I like to think I am open to all. So why do I talk about this now. It is because I feel strongly that this is a bit trickier than who is the better candidate. Lives are depending on this decision. 

What I know about the political climate we are in now is this, it has been made out to be who it is rather than What it is. This goes beyond the person elected. It is about what comes next. I believe, and was raised to believe, that if we are in a more privileged position in life that we must make it our duty to protect others less fortunate than us. 

Yesterday we celebrated Veterans Day and honored my Dad at his care facility. He risked his life for American freedom. And that did come at cost to him and his health. He taught me to value life and to help others in need. And now I reflect on this: What risks am I willing to take to protect the rights of others?

My Dad in 1969 posing by a red convertible.

As it stands today, I had more freedom for the whole span of my life (I'm 51) up until 2 years ago when they took away the right for women to choose. That means my daughter does not have the same rights that I used to enjoy! That is absurd to me. And yes, it makes me angry because that is not progress.

Beyond these rights being overturned, I wonder what will become of other people's rights who do not fit a certain acceptable mold in society. And if this becomes a trend, what will be next? What other rights and freedoms will be taken away? And will other countries follow?

This year is teaching me to stop hiding behind things like traditions, the norms, my parents, society and what people think is acceptable. As I have learned recently that for my whole life, I have been struggling with ADHD totally undiagnosed and unaware. It's another thing I'm coming to terms with and here are some questions I reflect upon:  How do I want to be now that I am free of being something I am not? Who am I really? How do I want to share my voice and show up?

These events in my life right now are calling something out in me that I have not felt ready nor comfortable in showing because of fear, because of what I learned to do as a child and what not to do. But now I am getting a swift kick in the pants to be in my full leadership and power using that privilege to do away with all those things I learned over a lifetime and be the woman who protects the rights of all people. This call has been there always in whispers and ideas along the building of my business and my career. But now, the fire alarm has been sounded and the only question I have left is this: 

Will I be brave enough to let go of all my perception of staying safe and acceptable so I can stand up for others & help make changes for future generations like my father once did?

There will be more to come from me on this. I do not know where I'm headed but I do know that my heart will lead the way. 

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